A Practical Outlook on Your Limiting Beliefs
Hello Dear Friends,
Our reactions to similar circumstances can differ widely from person to person. For instance, two individuals faced with the same task, like speaking in public, may experience different levels of stress. One might feel confident, while the other battles anxiety and a nagging inner critic. These internal responses often result from the beliefs - which are the deeply ingrained thinking patterns shaped by our past experiences and biased self-perceptions - we have internalized over time.
Albert Ellis, the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, identified twelve irrational beliefs that we may internalize, leading to imbalances in our lives. These beliefs fall into three major categories: perfectionism, the need for validation, and a sense of entitlement. Let's explore how they can manifest in our lives:
Perfectionism: Believing that you must succeed and achieve at all costs can lead to workaholic tendencies. While ambition and striving for success are healthy, feeling a compulsive need for it can result in neglecting other aspects of life and deriving self-worth solely from external achievements and belongings. This relentless pursuit of success can lead to anxiety, shaky self-esteem, and a low tolerance for failure.
Validation: Internalizing the belief that you must be loved or gain the approval of others can lead to people-pleasing behaviors. Prioritizing others' needs and conforming to their expectations to earn validation can lead you to avoid conflict at all costs in your relationships. This behavior may lead you to suppress your true feelings, sacrifice your integrity, and turn a blind eye to inappropriate behaviors in others. In the process, you’ll mistakenly believe that you’re nice, but in reality, you’d only be harmless
Entitlement: Believing that life should be easy and that others should treat you the way you want can lead to procrastination and a low tolerance for frustration. This mindset can result in a feeling of powerlessness in the face of challenges and a tendency to perceive oneself as a victim.
Recognizing and challenging these internalized beliefs is the first step toward a more balanced life. It's essential to cultivate self-awareness to identify them and critically evaluate whether if they serve your best interests. Remember, you have the power to control your thoughts rather than the other way around. By shedding light on these internalized ideas, you can embark on a journey of self-discovery and conscious decision-making, and that’s what I invite you to do in my extensive course collection.
